Do You Hear What I Hear? No…

Haaappy Friday, Haaaappy Friday! Make sure you sing those, that’s why there’s extra ‘A’s in there. Anyhow, how is everyone on this fine day  before the weekend shenanigans and the fight of lifetime..our time…this month…I don’t know. I’ll be honest, I don’t give a shit. I can watch it on tv or I can see the highlights on YouTube. Boxing, MMA..not really my deal. I like Football and really that’s about it. Sports take up a lot of time, I can’t do that shit all the time. I have shows that I’m addicted to, hobbies, sleeping, drinking, smoking, eating. There’s just too much more to do and I’m a very easily swayed into new shit to do as well so I can’t possibly follow more than one sport. Why in the shit am I talking about sports on here? Let’s get into this shall we?

Alright look, straight up..AD’s that claim to hear every sound made on the stage during a rehearsal and then sound like choking dogs on the radio trying to express their anger while whispering. You all or Y’all need to chill the Fuck out because one of you is going to suffer a stroke on the radio and that is not a story that you are going to want to have to tell over and over when people ask why you passed out on set or even worse die from the nonsense. Can you imagine if in one of those moments of complete loss of rational control you just dropped dead? All because you heard the greens guy dolly tire squeak. I’ve been on shows where they get so angry that they start whisper shouting to clear the stage. Which is always the worst possible idea because then you have a bunch of pissed off crew children..people walking out making more noise in protest. We’re all adults here remember? All of the production people are running around like crazy looking ninjas trying not to make any footstep sounds either because not only are we suppose to clear the stage, we must also fly while doing is as to not disturb the rehearsal with the pitter-patter of our feet against the ground. I mean I don’t even understand aren’t they acting? Can’t they act like we’re not there? That’s a joke…maybe.

I get it alright, I know that out of respect we’re suppose to be quiet during a rehearsal. I’m not trying to say that everyone should just be as loud as they normally would. I’m asking that we just try to stay rational. I understand that’s much to ask in itself because everyone has a different definition of rational. I’m just talking about these super bionic hearing AD’s that don’t even want the air to move. They need to really get a grip on reality. It’s not easy to get a message to 80 people who are trying to do their job. Especially when you randomly get into the rehearsal. Those are always really fun. There will be total silence on the radio, the crew is moving sets and then all of a sudden on the radio all you hear is “Rehearsing, Get it quiet!” Cool. Thanks for the warning. Ninja shhh-ing mode activated.

You know what I always wonder is why in the hell the AD doesn’t just ask the heads of the department if they’d be so kind as to tell their respected departments when they’re rehearsing and not to move anything. Because 90 percent of the time that there’s someone making noise and you ask them to be quiet they jump on the radio to ask their boss if they’re rehearsing and if they should stop. How fucked is it that in our business when you ask some people to be quiet at times because your boss is asking you to ask them to be quiet they ignore everything you say and ask someone else that is not even in the same room if they should even pay attention to you. That’s fucking bananas right? That’s not normal working conditions right?

You know what I find the most amusing is that the sound department hears everything. Those mics pick up a lot of stuff and if it’s something that is unbearable they’ll let production know so we can take care of it. However the way some of these ADs act at times you’d think that they were getting paid extra per complaint of random uncontrollable sounds made. Did you all dream of being Sound Mixers and miss your shot? Someone once told me that they do that because it shows a sort of authority to the rest of the crew but I’ll tell you that if that is what some of you think you have it wrong. The AD’s that do this on the radio are usually the ones that everyone dislikes because you know what humans in general don’t necessarily like? They don’t like to be told what to do by anyone. We like to feel that we are in control. So when we see other people trying to control others we hold that against them. Crew will usually talk mad shit about AD’s like this because it seems petty to have your crew running around like silent raptors trying to track down every creek, ssssss, shhhh, burp, sound on set. Sound happens everyone and while we can control most of it we cannot control all of it.

Honestly once again I’m just concerned with these particular stressed out people’s well-being. It’s crazy to get so worked up about a sound and if that’s what the producer, actor or any other higher up is expecting of you then maybe you should find someone else to work for. I mean for fucks sake the “Sound Stages” aren’t even sound proof. Anyone work on a fully sound proof stage all the time because I’m pretty sure every stage I’ve worked at if someone walks by the elephant door talking, we will hear that entire conversation…well at least the length of the door. I’ve always joked that the guy that put all the sound padding that covers every stage I’ve worked at out here in L.A made a killing with that scam. Well, maybe when they first installed the padding YEARS ago it was way more effective. I seriously think that some of that padding might have been there since the stage was first constructed. That can’t be healthy.

Thanks for reading everyone! I wish you all a fantastic weekend full of fun and awesomeness and french fries and pizza. AD’s out there if you think this was directed at you personally it might be because you do this. I’ve said it many times that this is not a place where I go to talk shit about people but to discuss how I personally feel about certain situations within our business. I’m not trying to tell anyone how to do their job or to change, you do you. I just don’t want anyone stressing out more than they need to especially over trivial shit that no one really cares about except for you. Trust your team, they know what they’re doing and if there’s noise or anything that is going to prevent you from rolling that camera they are going to get to it because we all want to go home. Alright I’m done, talk to you crazy people next week.

-PEACE

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