Seasoned Fools…

Happy Tuesday…Wednesday! A late as hell Wednesday post at that. It’s that holidays…well not really…it’s currently that time in between Christmas and New Years that no one can explain. I mean I guess there’s many people that went back to work already but in our line of work the town is still quiet. Everything will usually get back up and going after the New Year. I love this time off because my life abides by no time. I wake up at all crazy hours and sleep as much as I want. I’ll wake up at 4AM to walk the dog and then start watching a movie till I knock out. Wake up again at maybe 8AM, walk the dog, eat breakfast and then knock out again and wake up sometime around noon and start my day. I just find that time is just not important in my life when work isn’t part of it. So because of this time schedule I got going on I ended up posting late…a day late. Hahaha! That’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it. Alright now that I’ve gone on about my lazy ass time off schedule let’s get into this shall we?

The one thing that I continually find astonishing in this business is that someone can be a complete fool and be the absolute worse at doing their job but still maintain a steady job with no demotions or repercussions. We work in an industry where someone can completely fail upwards. While there is MANY people who work their asses off to get their job titles I believe that there is equal if not more people in positions that were just handed to them. Political hires are what we call them. Jobs that are given to someone because they know someone or they have money and bought they position which is also quite common in our business. I mean honestly if you are wealthy becoming a film producer only requires you to find a film/show to finance and boom, you’re a producer. This can be awesome because it can lead to new and innovative ways to look at film making if the person has good ideas that our film making minds hadn’t thought about. I do feel that sometimes our techniques could use a little polishing and a person that has never worked on a film may be able to see some holes in our process. Like why in the hell 12 hours is still the daily standard. However it can also go the opposite way and the person can just be a fucking monkey wrench in the entire process with their crazy unreasonable requests or suggestions. And the way it works in this business unfortunately is that those people in those positions that are terrible at their job are still smart enough to hire people under them that are way better at not only their job but also the job of said Boss and end up covering up and taking care of all their mistakes. So what happens is that the person that is in charge (We’ll call them Boss X) ends up looking like they are doing a fantastic job and a fucking all-star to person that hired them (We’ll call them Head Hancho) because of the people who Boss X hired (We’ll call them Crew). Boss X then just continues their career for years being praised by his Head Hanchos but still being absolute shit at their jobs. The Crew will never out them because most fear that they will lose their job or be black listed for going up against Boss X.

I’ve written about people being given their positions before but what brought on this particular post was that I always find it very amusing when these people who clearly were handed their job and can’t do it pull out the “I’ve been doing this a long time” excuse for why they assume they are right about something. I’m positively sure that there are people in this business right now that have been in a position of power for 20-30 years and are absolute shit at their job but have surrounded themselves with people who cover for them. Because of this reason when people in these positions say shit like “I’ve been doing this a long time” it means absolutely nothing at all to anyone that knows and has been in this business for a while. This circus does not require any type of time-table that I know of to hold these positions that are handed to people. I’ve seen this happen several times and in many different departments. I’ve been on crews where someone below Boss X offered up a suggestion for how to do something more efficiently and Boss X went against it just because he insisted that his way was the way it’s always been done and no need to fix what isn’t broken. This was Boss X first job with that title and it was a clear decision based on their ego. Because what kind of dumbass logic is that? While it makes sense that something that is working should not be tampered with ignoring a better and more efficient way to get the same or more work done is just fucking stubborn and stupid. I think that a good Boss or just a good person in general never resorts to such lame excuses as “I’ve been doing this a long time” as a reason why others should believe or follow what you’re saying. Trust me if you’ve been doing it as long you say everyone around you already knows so there’s no need to bring it up. However the real problem I have with this statement is that it seems to insinuate that since you’ve been doing this for a long time you know everything there is to know about it which is total bullshit. We can spend our entire lives dedicated to something and NEVER fully understand it because time is ever-changing and usually brings change to everything around us. I think that we need to continue learning everyday and never assume that we know everything about anything because of a timetable that we decided was long enough to make us the all-knowing about a particular subject.

Alright I’m done. Thanks for stopping by and checking out another post here at We’re Not Rolling everyone. If you’ve not checked out this weeks Toke Talking Podcast make sure you do. It’s a little change from the constant rambling of film industry topics that I do on here. Instead you can listen to me go on about a ton of other subjects instead. Have a great rest of your week and make sure to stop by on Friday for my last post before 2018!


The Toke Talking Podcast Episode 37

Hello! I have a guest!! Be my guest! Be my guest! You know how the song goes. This week Leah Sargent joins the podcast to talk about her job at Marvel. We also ramble about a whole bunch of other topics and only touch on them lightly before moving on because that’s how I do things around here. You know there’s always a bunch of laughs, come check it out NOW!


That Time We…

Happy Friday!! Welcome to We’re Not Rolling, I’m your host Bob Barker. No, that’s not true. Here’s a funny story about Bob Barker though. When I moved here from Sunny/Rainy Florida to Sunny/Never Rainy (Till this year) California we drove across country and stopped at both, big known cities like Vegas and some less known random ass cities. Well when we were looking on the map to get here…yes were still in map times then…we came across a city named Truth or Consequences. They call it “T or O” for short…I don’t know why because I would love to tell people “I’m from Truth or Consequences.” Do you know what a great conversation starter that would always be? It sounds so bad ass. Anyhow the city is in New Mexico and was originally named ‘Hot Springs’ but then changed its name when Ralph Edwards the host of the quiz radio show ‘Truth or Consequences’ announced they would air their 10th anniversary from the first city to change their name to that of the shows. Hot Springs had that honor. So long story longer, Bob Barker was also a host on that show and this entire town has Bob Barker stuff EVERYWHERE!! Pretty cool if you like that type of stuff. Alright, let’s get into this shall we?

I haven’t told a story here in a while and this one popped up when I was thinking so here we are. Now for those of you that have been reading the blog for a while you may know that I had the absolute pleasure of working on the taken to soon from us Muppets TV show that ABC attempted to deliver to the world. You can read more about my time there on this post as well “What Do You Mean We Got Cancelled” if you’d like. We got to make 17 awesome episodes that to date I still consider one of the most creative jobs I’ve been a part of. I’ve worked on a ton of different shit but it truly was magic to see these Muppets actually come to life in front of me. Alright let me stop geeking out because it’s all I can do anytime I think of working on this because it was just amazing. So much fun and so many great memories.

So many memories in fact that here is yet another one. The show was mainly all filmed on stage or on the lot. We did not venture out often but when we did you can bet your ass that we caused a ruckus because well, it’s the fucking MUPPETS. Who doesn’t know and love the Muppets? I mean you just have to be a terrible person. Moving on, I forget the day because well…that was a while ago but when I read the callsheet it said that we were going to be filming a scene with Fozzie driving. I thought, cool we’re probably going to drive up and down the back lot or some small side street somewhere. However when I looked at the location it read the 101. Hahaha! Alright for those of you that don’t live in L.A, the 101 is one of our major Freeways/Highways. Needless to say I was excited as a pig in shit to watch this get filmed because who the hell wouldn’t?

We got all our shit together, everyone loaded up and we headed out of the studio. Now as some of you that work in the business would assume we had the car on a process trailer. Which for the non combatants can best be described as a platform in which you load the car on and then pull with truck. The platform has 3 additional feet of flooring around the car so the crew can move around, light and place the camera to film the scene.

Pretty cool huh? This is not my picture, I just googled process trailer. Don’t sue me photo owner. HA! Back to the tale… As we are pulling out of the lot the best transmission request came across the radio. “Hey everyone if we can avoid people in other cars taking pictures let’s try to let them know.” HAHAHAHA! I just thought, there was about to be a parade of 4 police officers, 3 vans and a truck pulling a platform with 10-15 people on it with lights and cameras everywhere and oh yeah FOZZIE THE BEAR DRIVING A OPEN TOP CAR ON THE FREEWAY. If I was driving by I would probably pull over to take pictures and then run after the parade let alone was I going to be able to signal to other drivers from my van not to take pictures. I know that the request was said with a not serious at all tone but I just wanted to share that because it was hilarious. Honestly I could be running away from the police in a car chase and if I saw Fozzie driving I would stop to take a picture. It was just as amazing to be a part of as one can imagine and it’s one of my fondest memories of not only that show but my time in this business . When you’re around it all the time you become numb to the magic but then there are always instances like this that make you feel like a kid again and remind you why you work in this crazy business.

That’s it folks! Another week in the books here at We’re Not Rolling. Thank you so much for stopping by and checking out another post here. Make sure to come back and listen to The Toke Talking Podcast on Monday or listen to past episodes all right here on the site. If podcast aren’t your thing then I’ll have a NEW post up here Tuesday. Have an excellent weekend and be good to one another.


That Time I Died…

Hello and welcome to We’re Not Rolling. If you’re new here your visit comes complete with a posts some good, some great, some bad (I’m sure), some sad but the one constant I try to maintain is to keep you (The Reader) laughing. I think it’s a crazy business (Film Industry) and needed a place to share the madness and so this blog was born. Those of you that are reoccurring visitors here, thanks for coming back! How was everyone’s weekend? Loud and Crazy or Quiet and Peaceful? I’m a fan of both and try to get a healthy dose of each every weekend. Although I must say there hasn’t been much crazy lately. I can’t control the ‘loud’ part, I’m always loud, I’m Cuban. Alright let’s get into this shall we?

As you know is the routine here I always try to come up with a funny, witty title. You know sort of like the news does ALTHOUGH I really feel they should not. I don’t think news outlets or newspapers should try to come up with clever titles when the matter is serious because I think it fucks with some people. Whatever, I’m not going to get into that here point is I have never died in real life but I did play a dead guy on camera and that’s the story I’m here to share. I might have shared some stories from my time on the show ‘The Bridge’ for FX on here but honestly I don’t remember. This was the only show that I was there from the pilot till Season 2 when they got cancelled. Not only that but I was also 1 of 4 crew member wise (Not including above the line folks) that made it from the pilot to the actual crew on Season 1 so that was pretty cool too. I know that may sound strange to people out there that might not work in this world. One would think that the crew that works on the pilot would automatically work on the show as well but most the time this is not the case because the time in between when the Pilot is filmed in relation to the beginning of Season 1 at times is months even years in between and people who worked on the pilot can’t just hang around waiting. The reason I bring this up is because I think it’s the reason I was considered to be the dead guy.

I built a really good relationship with the Producers and Creators on this show after being together so long and I actually popped up on the show 2 other times as well. Definitely didn’t get as much Camera time as my car, that sucker was in that show a bunch of times. Hahaha! I’m not an Actor and if it was anything where I was going to have to speak I probably would’ve passed but I was all game when they asked me if I wanted to play a dead person. The scene took place in an underground cave in Mexico in a hidden chamber sort of place. We weren’t in Mexico obviously, this was all built on a sound stage. In the scene one of the lead actors sneaks in and discovers 3 bodies at a table that seem to have been involved in either a poker game gone wrong or some type of Russian Roulette. I was playing Body 1!

As you can see from the pictures, I was laid out on the table, brain spattered everywhere with a golden gun still in my hand. The actor would come in and take the gun out of my hand and continue on his way.

This was so fucking cool to do. I loved every fucking minute of it. I’ve always been a fan of FX makeup and it was awesome to see them apply all that stuff on me. I loved it so much that I actually kept it on for most the day and went around every where playing dead as you can tell from the second set of photos. I contemplated going home like that and playing dead in my living room when my roommate came home but I thought I might give her a heart attack so I decided against it. I’m still torn about that decision just because it also would’ve been very, very funny and you know damn well I would’ve recorded it. Hahaha!

The question I get all the time is if I was nervous and I can honestly say I really wasn’t…I mean I was playing dead on a table. Who hasn’t played dead before? I will however say that I was worried about breathing too much. I think if I was nervous I probably would’ve shook or something. I know the first time we did it I was definitely breathing too much because I had no reference to the timing of when the camera would land on me so I fucked it up. After the first take I knew exactly what the actors actions and the cameras were so I was able to time my slow breathing when the camera was on me. Damn! Now in hindsight, I’m so happy I wrote this story because it just reminded me about how much fun that was. As I said before I’m not an actor and never dreamt of being one but you can’t help but geek out a little when you see yourself on television. I’ve been put in a couple of scenes on a couple shows while I’ve been working in the business but this was by far the most personal. I mean as you can tell from the pictures the camera got right in my face and that was the shot they used. A lot of times you do these little cameos and they get scrapped in the editing room but this one made it in and I will forever be thankful for the memory.

Thanks for popping by and reading another post here at We’re Not Rolling ladies and gents. I appreciate all of you! Please make sure to Subscribe and if you have any Stories, Rants, Tips or anything Film Industry related that you would like to share on here please let me know in the comments or email me directly. Have a great week and I’ll be back to ramble again on Friday.


Behind The Crew…

Hello. Welcome. How in the hell are ya? Did your Monday start off on the right foot or are you already dreaming of the weekend? I had a great Monday. We were wrapped by 630 and I was home by 720. Continue reading “Behind The Crew…”

How Long Are We Going Today…

Happy Friday fuckers! Is that too much? Or have I now bitched enough to all of you that you read that as a term of endearment? When you read my jargon now is it like you’re listening to a close friend on set that although you just met you feel very connected to by the end of the season because you spend so much time together? Continue reading “How Long Are We Going Today…”

I Miss Theme Fridays…

Happy Tuesday everyone! How was everyones Super Bowl weekend? How about that game huh? Holy shit, that was an epic!! Continue reading “I Miss Theme Fridays…”

The Monday Morning Toke Talking Show Episode 1

It’s HERE!! My 1st Podcast. Well if it’s even working yet. I’m still figuring out how to get it on iTunes and all that shit but this is a start. This week listen to me ramble about what I’m going to be talking about on here on the Podcast, The Walking Dead, Hiatus and my old ass dog farting everywhere.